Tuesday, September 20, 2005
Okay. I've got to come clean.
IM DEPRESSED AS HELLWHY?!
cuz of my brother. yes, Russell.
the handsome boy in my family...
I feel so misunderstood. I doubt anyone would understand..
I mean he's only 10, so it may seem immature.
But he's so...
mean....
I don't understand.
He does not know what I'm going through! At school, or with my friends...
Well mostly its school. SCHOOL IS KILLING ME.
He is always antagonizing me okay.. He's always going against me!
And every time..
EVERY TIME,
I try to get him on my side.. To make him understand my plight,
he just goes against me.
And my parents always side with him.. So who gets scolded?!?!
ME.
Let me give you one example... today:
I come home from a long day of school and SL, all exhausted and worn out
AND WHAT DO I SEE WHEN I OPEN THE DOOR TO MY ROOM?
MY WORKSHEETS. MY BOOKS. MY NOTES.
ALL STREWN OVER THE FLOOR.
THEN I SEE MY BROTHER.
IN FRONT OF MY COMPUTER.
I HEAR A GIGGLE AS HE RUSHES PAST ME.
THE COMPUTER IS ON. BLASTING MY SONGS. MY MUSIC.
THE WEBSITE?! : NICKSPLAT.COM
I TRY TO GET HIM TO CLEAN UP FOR ME.
"NOOO! DADDY SHE'S HITTING ME!"
THEN WHO GETS THE BLAME FOR ALL THAT BULLSHIT?!
ME.
WHAT DOES HE DO?
HE SMIRKS.
Okay. I want to hate him.. But everytime.. I.. TRY to hate him.. I can't. Cuz I'm REMINDED. I'm REMINDED of when he was my BEST FRIEND. when we were KIDS. When he was that lovable 5-year-old. I love him you know.
But he's so uncaring...
He breaks my heart more than anyone!!!
And he's 10 years old.
I don't understand...
All that heartache.
I just don't know why!!!!!
So if I seem depressed, I am. And you know why.
Oh dear..
I'm crying.
MY WHOLE FAMILY IS AGAINST ME.
"Genevieve stop being so crabby. Your brother is just a kid la, stop scolding him"
Ohmygod.. the world is SO unfair.
++torn and heartbroken++